Together Life

Together Lifepenguin_pair

 (Living with gender dysphoria) 

Born one way,

          Alive another.

Dysphoria.

Neurosis?  No.

Psychosis?  No.

Gnosticism?  No.

Birth trauma?  No.

Original sin network? Probably.

Original child?  Yes.

Anomaly?  Yes.

Why?

Womb designed:

“You have possessed my reins, You covered me in my mother’s belly.”

Estrogen informed inheritance now a

                                                Concave mystery.

The diagnosis     outside the womb:

I am defined by anger-

                    “We don’t like what we don’t understand.” And,

                    “This must be sin, a mental malady.”

We need a label for this can of worms.

          Black and white must exist as separate strata.

          Grey must be painted black.  Restore order.

                    “Things must be done decently and in order.” And,

                    “We’ll call it homosexuality, perversion, lack of truth, neurosis.”

A preconceived label reveals the toxic ingredients to the weak of heart and stomach.  Not socially viable. 

-I find a new family,

 Formed with friendships,

                   Extending beyond the continents of fear.

 It draws me into uncrossed arms

 Nesting my being,

 Wombing me.

-Grace and mercy now affix their approval onto my head with a kiss.

          (My Lord accepts me as His daughter.)

 He has many names for me.  These endearments are hush-hush.

 These names and many other things are spoken from His lips

 To my understanding

 To my DNA:

          A shepherd boy, a shepherd girl-

          “Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

          A shepherd girl slays the giant red dragon

          With a slingshot of prayer and stones of faith, faith in the one who is immutable,

           Yet, He changes m  a  t  t  e  r before our eyes.

“Man by the pool, what do you want?

“I want to be whole, Lord.”

Symbiosis?  Yes.

Living from inside out

Life aligned.

Whole.

          Dysphoria dies, yet

I am alive, as one reined in and re-knitted.

Heaven undisguised.

***

© Sally Paradise, 2010, All Rights Reserved

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: